Happy Birthday!
On Tuesday, I turned 41. After hitting a milestone birthday last year and jetting off to Mykonos, I decided to keep the celebrations relatively low key this year. A morning spin class followed by dinner with my bestie at my new favourite Mexican restaurant in Chelsea; Ixchel. Guacamole, prawn tacos, fish tacos, crispy potatoes, chocolate and chilli ice cream along with lots of ‘virgin spicy’ mocktails filled my belly.
Celebrating my birthday in sobriety felt amazing. The desire to drink will never fully go away but the thing that stops me is knowing how horrendous I will feel the next day. Who knows if I will ever drink again. My sobriety journey was never about not drinking again ever, but more about breaking a dangerous habit that was; totally obliterating myself with drugs and alcohol every couple of months. I knew deep down that if ever I was going to get on the property ladder and write my book, all of that stuff had to go. And it worked! Within a few months of getting sober, I was on the property ladder. A year later I had written the first draft of my book, Unashamed. I’d like to think that one day I can get to the stage where I just drink once, maybe twice a year on my birthday and at Christmas, if I feel the urge. But for now, mocktails and 0% Heineken work well for me.
Even though I had a couple of slip ups in the first two years, I didn’t beat myself up about it. I know how damn hard I have worked to get to this point. The number of social events I have been to and said ‘no’ (including numerous dance music events and my own book launch party!) is not to be underestimated. The progress I have made is huge. From totally obliterating myself with drugs and alcohol every couple of months to just a couple of slip ups with alcohol in the first two years of sobriety is progress that I am very proud of. Everyone’s sobriety journey is different and until you go through it yourself, you will never fully understand the challenges it comes with. I am now into my third year.
My pleasures now revolve around food, walking in nature, time spent with friends, meditation, masturbation, spin classes, reading, sober raving, mocktails and lots of cups of tea! In true Leo style, I will be stretching out the birthday celebrations for as long as possible. Life is to be cherished and if there is one time of year I truly cherish being alive, it’s my birthday. It really is a privilege to grow old.